gsibling gchat

me:  ben. 

our sink isnt draining properly, 

so its just a puddle there

stagnant cess pool

and i was brushing my teeth

(i had just put in my contacts)

and i spit in the cess pool

 Ben:  ughhh

 me:  and the foamy toothpaste liquid

splashed up into my eye
:-)

also

sometimes i feel like i might actually die of loneliness

:-D

 Ben:  well, you'll die of something

who is my brother

what is happening here

what is this about

playful sibling banter

Ben and Hallie go to Las Vegas

 me:  hey ben

what if the freaky friday thing happened to us

 Ben:  what?

Also, please check in to your flight tonight

 me:  like we switched bodies

i was in your body

crazy right

HAHAHHAHHA

 Ben:  hey

ok, I am checking in for uis

 me:  oh

for me too?

 Ben:  you're good with 1 carry on and one personal item, right?

Yeah, I guess we have the same ticket

 me:  Yep

 Ben:  ok, good

 me:  lets switch bdoies for the trip

lets freaky friday

 Ben:  ok

I'm printing our boarding passes

 

 me:  Ok

thanks responsible brother

 Ben:  ok, let's not freaky friday

 me:  what

why not

 

 me:  is it because its not friday yet

 Ben:  yeah, also look what I have done to this body

don't put me in charge

 me:  It'd only be for the weekend

how much could you fuck up?

 me:  I'd take your body and go do huge cannonballs in the pool

I'd be such an asshole

 Ben:  HAHAHA

now you see why I am me

 me:  I'd hit on so many women, too. I'd be like, "did you see that cannonball I just did?"

 Ben:  haha

oh hey SO

 me:  STOP CHANGING THE SUBJECT

I'd also get you a nose piercing probably, since it's Vegas and you only live once.

 Ben:  HEY SO

SOSOSO

 me:  I'd spend your savings

at the slot machines

 Ben:  I am getting on a Pittsburd/Bay Point BART at civic center at 4:10

 me:  And even if I lost I'd say really awful stuff like "KA-CHING"

And I'd probably wear a gold chain necklace.

 Ben:  And at the airport at 5ish

we should coordinate, as I have your boarding pass

 me:  I'd hit on MILFs who are like, there with their baseball-hat-wearing husbands

I'd be really sleazy

and act like i didn't know who was a hooker

and who wasn't.

 Ben:  hallie, you are lliterraly laying out my plans for vegas

 me:  ONLY IF WE FREAKY FRIDAY

come on.

 Ben:  oh, fine

let's try it

 

 me:  Sweet,

We'll get chinese food at the airport

 Ben:  good

great!

Ok

I sm going to go pack

 me:  It's been great planning this trip with you.

I'll let you guys know how it goes.  

Ben's first memory

"I was 3 or 4... I was outside, and I was sitting on one of the stairs looking at this little concrete patio, and just staring at this pile of dog shit. And at that moment, I realize that I'm gonna die someday."

toilet time spiral

based on a real life experience of Benjamin Bateman.

Hand made gifts

The most memorable gifts are certainly those made by hand, and those that are really shiny and extremely expensive. I have been lucky enough to receive a few of the former:

The Pie Bandit, sewn by my brother Ben. The Bandit is a superhero somewhat like Robin Hood: he steals pies from other, less worthy people and gives them to me. Yes, that is a pie attached in his right hand. You can kinda tell, but he also has a cape.

My friend Kyle made this awesome sunflower entirely, it seems, from office supplies. The stem is the bent wires of a spiral bound notebook, and petals and leaves are the bent casings of erasers from pencils. It is one of the few sunflowers that can survive entirely without the sun.

  

My little brother Nick made this ceramic doll/rattle shaped like a little monkish-character. It fits perfectly in your hand and it makes everyone happy. I imagine if a baby saw it they would be really happy, because babies love rattles and it wouldn't fit in their mouth so they couldn't choke on it. I know babies worry about that a lot.

Brother News

My older brother Ben is biking up South America at the moment with his best friend, Sam. I've really been enjoying their trip journal and website which can be seen here: http://www.againwiththebiking.org/.
Because Ben has been gone for all the winter holidays and family gatherings, we created a paper mache version of him to fill the weird gappy feeling. While it's nice to have "Ben" around, he makes the dogs nervous and he's too quiet. Since Thanksgiving his health has deteriorated and he sits in a wheelchair now, with his head slumped forward a bit and his stuffing showing. Sometimes his hands fall off.
"He's so despondent" says Nick.